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Saturday
06Oct

Annoy a Moderate. Make Stupid Bumper Stickers.

DateSaturday, October 6, 2007 at 12:13PM

annoyaconservative.jpgFrom Ask Figaro:

Hi,
There is a bumper sticker that reads, “Annoy a Liberal, Succeed, Be Happy.”  What kind of argument is that?  A fallacy? Thanks,
Diahn

Dear Diahn,

When I say tomato, do you say tomahto? I ask not just because of the way you spell your name. Like your annoying quotation, my question is an isocolon (Greek for “equal member”), a figure that repeats phrases or clauses of similar length. 

We won’t call a foul on the bumper sticker, because it’s within bounds to imply that liberals, egalitarian souls that they are, would resent a self-made fat cat.  But surely the right can do better than that.  How about “Annoy a Liberal, Inherit Money, Say You Earned It?”  No, that wouldn’t quite work either. “Annoy a Liberal, Shoot a Burglar” might be closer to the mark.  Figaro prefers, “Annoy a Liberal, Make a Bumper Sticker That Begins with ‘Annoy a Liberal.’”

Any other suggestions for annoying liberals and conservatives?

Fig.

AuthorFigaro | Comment24 Comments |

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Reader Comments (24)

"Annoy a Liberal, Talk About Freedom."
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFosterchild
"I Don't Care Enough About Liberals/Conservatives to Annoy Them"
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterMarfa
Annoy Printers. Don't Buy Bumper Stickers.
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterJohn
Annoy a Conservative: Marry Gay, Be Happy
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterElise
I don't see why conservatives are called "conservative." They seem to be the ones who want to change this country. So here's my contribution to annoy the far right:

I'm a Conservative. I Believe in Civil Rights.
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterTomas
"But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth."
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterSentient
Nice one, Sentient. It's interesting that Matthew 6 has the right hand giving to the poor. Which inspires another bumper sticker:

"Annoy a conservative. Quote Jesus."

Fig.
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFigaro
I guess in fairness, I should annoy a liberal now.

"Annoy a liberal. Quote Jesus."

Fig.
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFigaro
I've forgotten the word for the trick of using words that sound the same as if they meant the same, but how about

Annoy a Conservative—Conserve the world!

Although in actual politics, far too many choices seem to be made on the basis that whatever annoys the other side must be good—and whatever the other side is doing, must be solely to annoy our side.

My lefty friends would probably hand-letter (rather than purchase) signs that said something like "Annoy a liberal—advocate real change!"

Thanks,
-V.
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterVardibidian
Your conservative/conserve figure is a polyptoton (po-lip-TOE-ton), which repeats the root of a word in a different form.

Fig.
October 6, 2007 | Registered CommenterFigaro
all you have to do to annoy a liberal is make him read the newspaper.

your pal,
blake
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered Commenterblake
Great bumper sticker, Blake. It probably would work for both liberals and conservatives.

Fig.
October 6, 2007 | Registered CommenterFigaro
Annoy a CONservative: Do your own thinking
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterKirk Muse
See today's image, Kirk.

Fig.
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFigaro
Annoy a conservative, cut spending, and support small government.
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterJohn
What do you call the figure of changing a title, idiom, or known statement slightly, like we're all doing here?
October 6, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterSpencer
Are these slightly different forms of the same "argument" snow clones?
October 7, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterLinda
They are indeed snowclones (they're clones, so you use one word). They're figures that change a cliche for a new purpose. See http://www.figarospeech.com/it-figures/naked-is-the-new-clothed.html
October 7, 2007 | Registered CommenterFigaro
Hey Fig how about:

"Annoy a conservative/liberal, challenge their beliefs in a constructive, rational and delibrative manner"

or to put it simply...

"Annoy a conservative/liberal, listen to both sides of the argument"
October 8, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterShannon
That reminds me of the Calvin & Hobbes strip, where Calvin wonders why superheroes don't battle more realistic villains. Hobbes suggests that the heroes send letters to the editor and shouts, "Quick, to the Bat-Fax!"

Fig.
October 8, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterFigaro
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